2012 Releases Ranked: Part 1

We are half way through 2012 and so far, the planet is still here, the human race still exists and the cinema has been glorious!  Time to celebrate in the first of a two part post.  I have seen only 19 films that have been released in UK cinemas in 2012 so far.  Unfortunately the cinema continues to be too expensive and the lure of the Lovefilm rental service keeps me firmly planted on my sofa for most of my film watching.

So please pop back tomorrow for the top ten 2012 releases I have seen so far this year.  Here are the bottom nine and please bear in mind, even the worst is a 5 out of 10 in my opinion!  If you want to read anything I said about any of these, please click the title.

19. American Reunion 5/10

18. Like Crazy 5/10

17. Salmon Fishing in the Yemen 6/10

16. The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel 6/10

15. Friends with Kids 6/10

14. Martha Marcy May Marlene 7/10

13. Coriolanus 7/10

12.  Avengers Assemble 7/10

11. Sound of My Voice 7/10

What ten films could possibly be better than Avengers I hear you scream through gritted teeth?  Unless you think I'm completely insane, please swing by tomorrow to find out!  And feel free to let me know why any of these actually deserves a place in the hallowed grounds of my top 10 or on the other hand how right I am for casting these foul urchins out into the cold wasteland of the bottom 9.

April Round-Up: Part 2

Welcome back!  Just to be unconventional, here's my top 11 films of April!  If you missed the bottom 11, please click here.

11. Salmon Fishing in the Yemen (Lasse Hallstrom, 2012)

Fortunately this is not the world’s dullest documentary.  It’s actually an ok film about faith with a bit of romance.  Review here.

10. The Vanishing (George Sluizer, 1990)

Pretty ridiculous tale of a man obsessed with finding out what happened to his vanishing girlfriend.  The lengths this guy finally goes to are absurd but do lead to a brilliantly bleak ending.

9. The Night of the Hunter (Charles Laughton, 1955)

The kids aren’t alright.  They’re being chased by a lunatic.  A classic that stands the test of time... mostly.  In many ways this is way ahead of it's time.  I could see them remaking this quite effectively but they would be hard pushed to find someone to beat Robert Mitchum's eerie performance.  I never realised just how huge a homage Spike Lee was giving this film with the Radio Raheem Love Hate speech in Do the Right Thing.

8. Lars and the Real Girl (Craig Gillespie, 2008)

Or Ryan Gosling and the surprisingly understanding community.  When an odd but pleasant chap brings home a blow up doll, the community goes along with his declaration that she is a real person.  It's a sweet and sympathetic film that relishes in the goodness of people.  Therefore it's hard not to like.

7. Vanishing Point (Richard C. Sarafian, 1971)

Like Easy Rider but with just one guy and a car.  The death of the sixties never looked so cool or so exciting.  Great car action, a naked girl on a motorbike and an outstanding soundtrack.  Existentialist cinema at its best.

6. A Night to Remember (Roy Ward Baker, 1958)

And a film to remember too.  James Cameron bought the rights to this before making his ‘version’ and clearly took notes from this impressive production.

5. The Day After (Nicholas Meyer, 1983)

One hour into this drama you have a spectacular series of explosive shots that send this film spiralling down into chaos and calamity.  It then turns harrowing and unforgettable.  An important film.

4. Tomboy (Celine Sciamma, 2011)

A beautifully observed slice of life about a little French girl who just wants to be one of the boys. Really well observed and engaging.  Features absolutely perfect performances from it's young leads, particularly the titular tomboy.  A little bit heartbreaking but also incredibly inspiring.

3. 21 Jump Street (Phil Lord, Chris Miller, 2012)

Laughed my ass off.  Haven’t seen so many dick jokes in a film for awhile but when they’re this funny, who am I to complain?  The sequence when the two protagonists take the new recreational drug of choice had me laughing harder than I have in a film for a long time.  Side-splitting, and totally irresponsible stuff.

2. Cabin in the Woods (Drew Goddard, 2012)

Plays with horror conventions while playfully mocking the horror movie audience.  Smart, funny and probably even cool for non-horror fans.  See review here.

1. Titanic 3D (James Cameron, 2012)

Ok so it's not a new film but it has been upgraded and I did see it in the cinema.  Still unbelievably epic.  I have lost absolutely no love for this film and it was a great experience to see it while being very aware that the Titanic was on its voyage 100 years ago to that very night.  The 3D works brilliantly in places and not so great in a few others.  Nevertheless my heart will go on for this and you can read why here and here.  I’ll never let go Jim Cameron.  I’ll never let go.

To top it all off, I am in the process of arranging a meeting with legendary production designer Peter Lamont of Titanic and Bond film fame.  You can be sure I will be blogging about this if I make it happen.

So what do you think of my list and rankings?  Should the infamous Human Centipede 2 have been top of the list?  Is it unfair to put Titanic 3D as number one?  Am I clinically insane?  How come I don't rate old films as high as new films?  What have you seen from this list and what's your favourite?

Salmon Fishing in the Yemen (Lasse Hallstrom, 2012) Review

Satire runs dry in a soggy romance.

Fisheries expert Dr Alfred Jones (Ewan McGregor) gets reeled in by a billionaire Sheik and his lovely assistant Harriet (Emily Blunt) in attempting to bring salmon and fishing to the desert of Yemen.  But can a love affair bloom in the arid region?

Despite his reservations, Dr Jones (far less exciting than his namesake, the adventuring archaeologist) accepts the offer of bringing fishing to the desert.  This decision is made easier by his tentative relationship with the Sheik’s delightful assistant but also because of the UK government’s pressure to create a story of positive Yemeni-British relations.  

Casting the net and catching Kristin Scott Thomas is the greatest achievement of director Lasse Hallstrom whose former glories (Chocolat, The Cider House Rules) seem like distant memories.  Scott Thomas lands the tastiest role as the Prime Minister’s press guru and gets all the laughs with the sneaking satire that made the book so well loved.  Her oily spin doctor slices through the sentimentality of the script delivering welcome moments of spiky dialogue like a cactus in a sea of sand.

Despite being quite an appealing character with his musings on faith and fishing, the Sheik’s motives for his expensive experiment remain fishy.  The violent complications that briefly add excitement to the story are dubiously dealt out by those typically slippery Middle Eastern stereotypes but the film does question the ethics and intentions of both the wealthy Sheikh and those intent on destroying what he intends to create.

The love affairs of the upper crust characters fail to ignite the screen with the relationship between McGregor and Blunt being a little damp but both stars give charming performances given the limitations and predictability of the script.  It’s all very typically upper middle class with restraint and lip-chewing over who should jump in the sack with who but the resolution is never in doubt and the emotions are all so reserved, it fails to hook the audience or swim away with any tears.

Simon Beaufoy, an extremely reliable screenwriter, adapts Paul Torday’s book but has lost much of the political satire present in the source.  Following excellent adaptations that even exceed their origins with 127 Hours and Slumdog Millionaire, this is somewhat of a disappointment from Beaufoy.  Next up he’s tackling Hunger Games sequel Catching Fire.  Let’s hope he hooks a bigger beauty with that one.

Nevertheless the film is infinitely more entertaining than anyone with no interest in salmon, fishing or Yemen would suspect.  It’s a sweet if only mildly satisfying romance that has a memorable turn from Kristen Scott Thomas.  As a whole, most minds will release it as quick as they caught it. 

While not even remotely close to being as boring as the title would suggest, this film is still highly unlikely to get you swimming upstream for it.

I give it 5/10 but I don't think I'm the target audience.

 

Released Friday 20^th April in the UK.